Letting Go is Hard

Actually I do not understand my feelings. Here I am, in love with Meow, yet I still feel envious towards ex n his bitch.
Jean told me she saw them together at Prangin Mall yesterday. Bitch has her hand round his arm/elbow. He never liked it, he is just forcing himself too much. He doesn't like shopping...but he is doing all this for the wrong girl.

Yesterday was actually one year exactly we had close contact. I bet he doesn't know or remember anything abt that.
He is so blindy in love with her. Even Bird told me that he doesn't like her, in fact the whole team/gang in his dept doesn't like that bitch. They said he is too blind. She is flirting behind him...not with one guy, but many at the same time. Why can't he see it ? Stupid...paying for her fees some more. Damn stupid. She will suck him dry and leave him...just a matter of time.

It's really sad to see someone u love and cared before drowning into deep shit. He has changed so much, so much that even as a friend, he doesn't do his part liao. He didn't even ask how I was or my dad when he knew my dad was hospitalised last month...what a friend huh!

I need to let go, really let go...but I am here still...as his friend...if he ever needs me...my friendship is ever ready. God Bless him.

Patch Up

I am so happy for sis that she n Kit patch up. It's good to have some time together without the young one around. She has to learn to trust her MIL no matter how she does not like it. After all, her MIL loves Ryan ma.

Finally, after much 'probing', Meow admitted to buying cigarettes from shop downstairs of his office, not the whole packey but by stick, each cost RM 0.40...he said average 2 - 3 sticks wor...cannot tahan wor...sigh ! I am so upset abt it. I wish and pray he could stop smoking for his health and own good.

Ok liao

Well, turned out Meow was having flu....that was why he so quiet and moody. But he could've told me ma. We are ok liao...but still I wish he won't pretend and ignore me whenever I questioned about him smoking. I prefer to talk about it. Ish...geram nya.

Sis called Sun afternoon complaining abt her MIL. She was crying....wish I could be there for her.

What have I done Wrong ?

I am so sad and frustrated. Meow is giving me cold treatment and I dun understand what I've done wrong. In fact, I should be the one who is angry.

I found out he's been smoking and everytime I confront him, he just kept quiet and act as if I was transparent...I was like talking to myself...he thought silence is the best defence...nope it doesn't work for me. I got even more upset and mad. But I kept quiet. I am just too tired to argue.

We haven't been talking much...and when I asked if he's angry with me, he said nope, in fact when he replied...he sounded so reluctant to talk to me. Argghhh !! Fine...I dun have the energy to ask liao... I am so tired and busy...let's see how long he wants to keep that way....my tolerance and patience do have limits !

Last week I was still very happy...I have this happy thoughts that I've found someone who really cares for me...I try not to think of some negative stuff....but now....sigh !

Pls...what have I done wrong ? If he cannot stop smoking...just tell me....I dun like ppl not being sincere. So sad n hurt now...